Colour Me Shocked

I never thought I would be admitting this.

I swore for months that I wouldn’t be one of these people (not that there is anything wrong with them.)

As much as I couldn’t wait to end my pregnancy – not only because of the excitement of BGWF, but also to be done with the sucky diabetes rules – I miss being pregnant.

Like REALLY miss it.

WTF?

So many of my Momma friends told me it would happen.  Even with the terrible symptoms, swelling, weight gain, mood swings, skin changes, health problems etc.  I denied it.  There was no way I could miss the hellish time I had being pregnant.

Until I wasn’t pregnant anymore.

I look at these precious little feet everyday, and remember when they were inside.  I miss the kicks.  I miss touching her little feet covered by my belly.  Moving them when they stuck out too far.  Rubbing what I imagined were her tiny baby soles. 

As much as I love the resulted weight loss results of my gestational diabetes stint, I truly miss my pregnant belly.  I never felt more radiant than I did the last two weeks of my pregnancy.  Even though I couldn’t get comfortable, and was too lazy to wear makeup…I felt like all anyone saw when they looked at me was my belly, and what a beautiful belly it was. 

I miss our nightly 3-mile walks.  Even when it was still toasty warm outside, I would suffer through them because it was the right thing to do.  I thought I would be thankful when it was done and I could get back to running.  Yet, I miss it.  With the Arizona heat kicking in full force, we can’t take BGWF outside to walk with us, it’s just too warm…so until the fall, no walks. 

I miss spending 100% of my time with my girl.  Now that she’s an outside baby, I have to share her.  I’m happy to, of course 🙂  But I won’t lie.  I miss when she was mine, just mine.

The biggest thing I miss though, is knowing that we had every milestone ahead of us.  When Aria was still an inside baby, I could imagine what all of the stages would be like, and couldn’t wait to experience them.  Now, she’s flying through all of those stages.  It seems like everyday we are saying goodbye to a little piece of Babyhood as we gear up for the next big thing.

These little feet don’t stay little feet for nearly long enough.

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5 thoughts on “Colour Me Shocked

    • Not for quite a while I think. We’re going to wait until The Hubs is finished with his Doctorate, so at least two years.

  1. Oh my goodness, I’m so glad to hear others feel this way! Knowing J, I wish I could be pregnant with him for just one more day. Then, I would know the personality behind each push and pull.

    When I was pregnant, T told me not to wish it away (smart guy!). He said he’d heard women spend 9 months wishing their baby were here, but the next 18 years wishing they were back inside (or something to that effect). 🙂

    BEAUTIFUL foot shot, by the way!

  2. Colour me not shocked! I told you 😛 Derek did too, as I recall.
    I can’t wait to meet your beautiful girl.

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